28 January 2006

As I wait for a dvd to transcode before the burn, I realize that there needs to be a new expression in the American vocabulary. Instead of 'this is as fun as watching paint dry', one needs to utter, 'this is as much fun as watching nero create an image for burning'. It's horrible. I mean, what, an hour to transcode/image, then 5 minutes to burn it all? Am I missing something here?

This is like back in the old days, like Internet Explorer 3 days, when you'd hit up some smarmy guy's website that had java scripts all over the place. Remember the flashing backgrounds, the cutesy pictures with the 'reflecting water' underneath, waving around? How about the cursors? The cube with the pictures rotating?

THIS CRAP COST PROCESSOR AND BANDWIDTH, MORONS. I always hated it when you'd get to a site and all of a sudden in the browser status bar it'd say 'starting JAVA'...and you'd be there for 3 minutes. It was worse than the Sega CD read time.

I had one friend who's short, abruptly sweet answer was to simply turn off all images and read pure text. I suppose had Jean Arnold been involved with my pc at the time I would have done the same thing. Wait...he was involved with mine. Nevermind.

"You don't neeeeeed 16MB of RAM..."

I enjoy waiting 13 months for a computer to be built, and then finally calling him to find out where the hell it is, only to have him tell you 'I can't talk now'. It was actually the police there, searching his house right before he went to slammer academy.

*sigh*

And then the bloody sound card didn't work.

So I traded a chimp subcriminal techhie for a sexually perverted gun freak with a penchant for Lolitas and wood to pursue and harrass minorities computer Lord. I watched him walk out of a movie once because Wesley Snipes kissed a white woman.

I never associated with him again after that. I gave up and eventually became a systems administrator and hardware gimp to avoid freaks altogether.

Now I'm one. But...you know, without the Lolitas and racists. Or police searching my home.



Yup.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Don't forget pages with multiple frames. I remember several pages where each image and block of text had it's own frame.

Dolores Haze (Lolita) was 12 in the book. I don't think you-know-who had anyone younger than 14. If they were younger that 14, then I don't want to hear about it. Acutally, I don't want to hear about it at all.

My skin is all crawly now.